The "Yell Parent"

So I'm a "yell parent". I didn't mean to be. I didn't want to be. Unfortunately, I slid into it. Arguing

with my 4-year-old. Angry that she wasn't doing what she was told. Forgetting that she's just 4 and

figuring things out. She's my oldest and of course, that means I think she's the smartest kid ever and

can't understand why she doesn't get certain things. That is on me. She's still a baby, not a teen or an

adult. I have to work on my own crap so that I can help her navigate through childhood while still

having fun.

It broke my heart to hear her say "That's ok, yelling is just what grownups do". I was horrified that

my daughter thinks that it is normal for grownups to yell at kids all the time. I knew immediately that

I had to do something. I want my daughter to grow up a strong confident woman. How can she do

that if I undercut her confidence by constantly yelling at her? So I decided to do something about it. I

purchased the book Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting by Dr.

Laura Markham.

I know a lot of people think that kids need to just listen and deal with it, but I find that I have a 

sensitive little girl who really wants to please and wants to know we approve of her. When I talk to

her gently and explain things and not yell it helps. I started using some of the techniques in the book

and I've noticed a huge difference in our interactions. I love it. She listens more, she understands

more and is wanting to do more.

Today we had such an amazing day. My daughter was laughing and smiling the entire time. Not once

did I see that look of apprehension and/or sadness on her face? Yelling doesn't accomplish anything,

but putting in the work for my kids is. I know we will have our challenges in the future but for now,

we are working together to have a better connection.




Now if you will excuse me I need to go give my babies lots of hugs.