It's the Month of the Irish!

Every March we get ready to celebrate Saint Patrick's day. In Rhode Island it is the month of the Irish rather than a day.

  This month celebrate the beautiful culture of the Irish. I will post Samsung series, facts and history about the country of my husband's childhood and my children's heritage.

Here are some things that's I have already posted on my personal Facebook page.

CORNED BEEF AND CABBAGE 

Did you know...

Corned beef and cabbage is synonymous with St. Patrick's Day and the Irish. Although it originAted in Ireland by the British , it is not actually a dish the Irish ate.

 I was surprised to learn that cows were a sacred animal and the only time they were eaten was when they were old. Instead, they ate pork. The rashers (or bacon) are a beautiful cut of pork belly that is really hard to find in the US. 

Apparently in the 19th century the British were well known for their insatiable appetite for beef. Ireland basically became their cattle playground. They created the first Irish salted beef using salt crystals the size of corn kernels amd wa la! We have corned beef. 

Despite Iteland being a destination specifically for the corned beef, due to the oppressive laws the British imposed on the country, and more specifically, the Catholic inhabitants, they just couldn't afford it until after the famine when they lived in areas that were flooded with cattle lowering the price. 

Being in the US and finally being able to afford beef and not having access to the pork they were used to, they began eating corned beef and cabbage. 

It is now mostly known as am American-Irish dish. It has in fact, changed over the last 200 years but the concept is the same. 

My husband was in this country for 5 years before even bothering to try it lol. It is NOT my favorite dish, but now that I know what the original cut of beef it came from, we just might have to attempt to make it!

https://www.smithsonianmag.com/arts-culture/is-corned-beef-really-irish-2839144/

Irish Genocide/Famine

Did you know...

In 1845 Ireland suffered from An Górta Mór or The Great Hunger. Most know it as the potato famine that brought so many Irish to American shores. 

The potato crops were heavily relied on as a staple food source because the Irish were not allowed to hunt and fish under British laws. If someone was Catholic (90% of the Republic is Catholic) they were not allowed to own land. The land was held by a small amount of protestant Irish and Englishmen. Between these two it kept the Irish in poverty and unable to get ahead. 

After a series of failures the crop fell hard to a disease that reportedly came from the Americas.  During this time 1 MILLION people died, mostly due to starvation. Another 1 million left the country. Often those who left would be on what was known as "coffin ships" because at least 1/3 died by the time they arrived at their destination. 

Most people do not go beyond this to know that there was in fact plenty of food in Ireland. The exportation of this food to England actually increased during the famine. The Prime Minister Sir Robert Peel managed to repeal the Corn Laws (laws that made corn and bread so expensive no one could actually afford them) but he was defeated at reelection because of it. The new government put Sir Charles Trevelyan in charge of the relief effort. Instead of helping, he actually LIMITED help very vocally believing that “the judgement of God sent the calamity to teach the Irish a lesson”.

It is now widely believed that the British leaders with prejudices against the Irish took full advantage of the potato famine and conducted a genocide of the people they had tried to break and dominate for so long. 

Ireland's population has never fully recovered from this event. 

https://www.parliament.uk/about/living-heritage/evolutionofparliament/legislativescrutiny/parliamentandireland/overview/the-great-famine/

http://www.irishhistorylinks.net/History_Links/IrishFamineGenocide.html

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.history.com/.amp/topics/immigration/irish-potato-famine

IRISH LANGUAGE 

Did you know...

That Ireland has two OFFICIAL languages? One is English and the other is Gaelic, but if you know anyone who speaks it, it is referred to as just Irish. Yes, they will correct you. "Is that Gaelic? Oh you mean Irish?..."

As of 2017 39% of the country CAN speak Irish, but only a small percentage use it as their primary language and on a daily basis. 

It is mostly spoken in Counties Galway (49%), Clare (45.9%), Cork (44.9%), and Mayo (43.9). Many of these places are located within what is called the Gaeltacht. This means that it is a government recognized part of Ireland that primarily speaks Irish. 

If you want to experience a bit of it go to Ireland and do the "Gaeltacht Experience". Or you could go to your local Irish bar, especially during big events. The Galway Bay Irish Pub tends to draw those who can speak it. Wanna see if you can hear a bit? Check out the concert on Thursday. Derek Warfield and the Young Wolfetones are coming and they out the Irish from all over ;)

So the next time someone mentions Ireland's language try not to gape with your mouth open and say "Huh? I just thought it was English with an accent." Know that it is a real and lovely language and getting stronger all the time.

(Sign can be purchased at Carroll's Irish Gifts)

Listen to the Voice

We all have that voice inside of us that tells us what is happening. It gives us warning bells, advice and more. It is our intuition saying "Hey, this is what is up". Do you listen to that voice, or do you squash it down and ignore it?

I've been learning to listen to it more. I listened to it a long time ago and it made for some awkward times. I didn't fit in, I went against the norm. So I ignored it. I ignored it for years. Then I started sorta listening to it until I started listening to Women Wanting More. Dr. Osburn urges you to listen to that voice inside, especially if it is loud and insistent. Listen to what it is saying. Your intuition can be strong. The term "women's intuition" didn't become a "thing" for no reason.

Don't let others deter you from listening to the Voice, the one that tells you that you can do it, that you are ready, gives you the ideas you need, tells you what path to be on.

Do you have someone who is telling you not too? Are they questioning what you want to do? Are they telling you it will never work? Stand up for yourself. Use you voice even if it shakes and cracks and scares you to your core. You are worth it. You are worth taking that chance. Go all in. Defend what you want.

The more you defend what you want and take the steps and actions you need in order to get there, the strpnger the Voice becomes. Be your own advocate. Yes you have to surround yourself with a tribe that will support you, but sometimes you will have to gain their support after you stand up for yourself. Don't let anyone bully you into thinking you can't do it or you aren't good enough.

Want to know more about what Dr. Karen has to say? Head on over to podcast episode #13 Speak Your Truth...Even if Your Voice Shakes.

What is Your Story?

These last several posts I've talked about some tough issues. Things in life that can be difficult but it is freeing when you break though. I can't claim credit, all of these thought provoking journies come from a motivational speaker (I don't know if she would really want to be called that lol). In previous posts I've added a link to her site. I'll add the podcast number and title to the bottom of each post from now on so you can listen to it yourself. If you decide to join her facebook page and follow her direction, let me know. It's been pretty good for me so far!

#WomenWantingMore

When it Gets Tough

There will be multiple times when you wanna say f*#k this, I'm done. I QUIT!

Don't every time you want to quit you are so close to a victory. Keep pushing through that wall. I gave up and quit far too many times. I hate being a quitter, but I did. I came up with every excuse in the book. I just let everything get in the way, allowing my fears to drown out all the hard work I put in long before now.

I dislike the idea of wasting my 20's and the first half of my 30's. I'm choosing to not see it as wasted time, but I do think I allowed things to get in the way. I created stories as to why I couldn't do it. Honestly? I'd probably still be telling stories, but after I had my girls I wanted more. I wanted more than to drift through a job. I wanted meaning, and a purpose in what I do for work. If my life wasn't going to be a stay at home mom, then I needed to be in a position to make a visible difference in people's lives.

I broke through the first story, and I've been getting rid of them slowly, but surely. I have a looooong way to go, but I'll make. I may want to quit a few more times, but I have a great support network. I have surrounded myself with people who know how much it means to me and support my decisions but are willing to tell me when they think what I'm doing may not work. Support with a dose of reality.

Make sure you have your network. It needs to be strong. If someone tells you that it won't work and you can't do it then you need to find a new network. You need people who will be a positive force in your life to share those great moments and get you through the low times.

So... who do you have there for you?

Is Fighting in Your Marriage Healthy?

No one likes to fight. It's exhausting and you can say some pretty nasty things if you aren't careful. Things you can't take back. You snip, snipe and snarl at each other, but in the end have you accomplished anything? Have you worked out what the issue was in the first place?

I hate fighting, but I hate the lingering resentment that comes with it. I also dislike the anxiety it creates when I'm angry and need to speak with him. I hate that feeling of having to talk about something that bothers me. No one likes to bare their feelings even if it is to their beloved partner.

So what to do? Well...suck it up. Talk to your partner. We rarely have a "fight", but when we try to make it as constructive as possible. No name calling. We say what we need to and stop bringing up past things that have already been resolved. We stick to the present. Even if it means that we yell (well okay, I yell lol) and get frustrated. I will say that any discussion we have typically is after the kids go to bed. They are still too young to understand the difference between a nasty fight and a loud or tense/ discussion.

It took us a long time to learn to be truly open to each other and to feel safe with each other. Once we reached that level in our relationship it became easier to talk to each other about difficult things. It was easier to fight on a civilized level and our relationship is better for it.

That doesn't mean once in awhile I don't feel nervous about a subject, but that's me, and nothing to do with him. He has never made me feel bad or belittled me. We still have things to work on, but what couple doesn't? It's only been 10 years. We have plenty more to work on our "fight" ;)

Why I got Rid of My Vision BOard

Growing up we were taught about vision boards. What are they? Vision boards are posters or boards with all of your goals and dreams on them. The type of job you have, the house you want, the wedding you want, the vacation you want etc. You can vision board just about anything. Even in the home businesses I joined previously we had team building exercises where we made vision boards or dream boards. They were fun! They were meant to inspire us to keep our dreams in front of us so we could cross them off as we made them a reality. The problem is that dream/vision boards are just that. They are the dreams and vision we have for our future, but what about the work we need to put into them? Are we doing anything except looking at them? Are we doing anything except looking at them? Instead of making concrete plans we continue to stare at our vision. 

Put away the vision board and make plans. Take the steps you need to actually move toward those dreams rather than just keeping them on a board. Dr. Karen Osburn from Women Wanting More challenges you to throw it away and take an actual step toward what you want. If you have a board then you obviously know what you want.  Take the knowledge of that and take an action step. Just one thing! 

For me, it was deciding what I wanted and signing up for the training. I became a Certified Lactation Counselor. I then signed up to take my massage therapy licensing exam. I'd failed before because I allowed my testing anxiety to get in the way. I passed. I was ELATED. I decided to make that one small step and then another and another. Months later I have changed my path, identifying what I want to do, and taking the steps to make it happen. Today I am also a licensed massage therapist with a place to call home. The goal will be to work with prenatal women into postpartum helping with breastfeeding and teaching parents to massage their babies.

I'm on my path, but that doesn't mean the work is done. I will have lots of work to do to make this into a viable business, but I"m willing. I'm willing to put in what is necessary to get what I want.

Are you?

Progress?

Well, so far I've maintained my temper...most of the time. Even the one time I "yelled" at her I didn't really yell. I was more annoyed and she knew it. We had a chat and it worked out.

So here I am going "okay, we've got this". What does she do? She bites a kid at daycare. My sweet empathetic little girl bit someone! Another girl she likes! What the heck?! Fiona may have a tantrum or two but they rarely last long and she certainly doesn't inflict pain on another child on purpose.

Instead of getting mad, as we were getting ready to home I told her that I'd heard she had a rough day. She mumbled yes, but she didn't really want to talk about it then. I talked to her about what happened. She did say sorry to the kid, but I wasn't satisfied that she knew what she did was wrong. The conversation we had was confusing. I wanted her to understand. I don't think we left the conversation as clear as I wanted, but she got the message that biting is not ok even when she's feeling lots of big emotions.  Hopefully, it'll be fine, but until then I'll just keep talking to her. She is only 4 after all and she's working through lots of emotions as she is getting older.